Yearning for Brewing Near Beer

Grant King

Grant King

— 2 min read
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Last year I brewed the world's most delicious near-beer. It was beginners luck. Ever since, I've been reluctant to try again. Why?

I don't really know. I've been telling myself it is to do more important things or that there are prerequisites to doing this thing. It is a few hours in the kitchen, not building a swimming-pool. Why am I beer blocked?

I think maybe if I talk about it I will be compelled to try it again.

Maybe I'll also acknowledge that my 2nd try at some things is never as great as the 1st. But that is OK, because the by the 100th time it will surely be better than the 1st time, and by then I'll understand the process deeply. This is how it is when I cook things. I can't explain why.

I'll start by attempting to conjure the ingredients from memory. The ingredients for this batch came together only once, over a year ago, in a manic fuge. The following list may be wildly inaccurate.

  • 5lb bag of rolled oats
  • medium malted barley
  • ale yeast
  • powdered coconut milk
  • bulk hops (meant for tea?)

I remember trying to keep it simple. I think I have notes about it somewhere and when I find them I can update whatever is wrong here. But accessing and finding the notes may be a source of blockage so memory is fine just to get going.

I used a brewing machine. It was super easy. I remember there were a couple of simple steps, making sure things were clean and then cooking the wort. There was a brief time (I think after cooking the grains?) when I steeped hops in the hot mess and then added the powdered coconut milk for body and flavor.

After all that, I drained it into a big glass jug and let it sit and cool for a long time. I added ale yeast while it was still slightly warm.

It stayed on the colder side of OK for a few days of a quick brew. When I first started to see a few tiny bubbles hugging the container, I took it out of the glass jug and put it into vaccum-seal bags in the fridge.

I am very sensitive to the smell of alcohol, but couldn't notice any in the product. I had a plan for vacuum distillation but it wasn't needed after all.

Likewise, there wasn't any noticeable carbonation. I put it in a keg and carbonated it the dry way with plain CO2.

The end result is something that I loved. Remembering it will motivate me to try again.

Do you brew? Do you spend too much on non-alcoholic beer? We aren't alone.

<3 Grant

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